Monday, December 21, 2009

What I Am

Here I sit the Monday before Christmas with all of my gifts that I need to buy bought, wrapped, put under the tree or in categorized boxes ready to go with us to IL.  You would think that would make me really happy, calm, peaceful and content.  But I wasn't earlier today.


I took a few moments to read my scripture for the day and BANG God hit me over the head with His loving discipline.  


Last week I had a fight discussion with my husband about some extra hosting plans that I hadn't really counted on in my vast "book of what I expect to do in the next week" that I carry around in my head.  And for the past couple of days I will admit I've been kind of fuming underneath the surface and perhaps leaking a little out from beneath the surface occasionally.


Then, yesterday morning I got to drive to church very early to sing in the cantata as well as driving completely and totally ALONE.  It was great.  I'm a person who really REALLY needs alone time and lately there hasn't been much of it.  So then this song by Sanctus Real comes on the radio and God just speaks to me through it.


Fast forward to this morning.  I woke up ready to get a lot done but thankfully took that break to read the Word.  What do you think today's message was about?  About being joyfully hospitable.  Now I love having people over and I love family but I also value my ability to PLAN for things.  That is all I'm going to say about that.


Holidays are hard for me in another way.  Even though I've lived here for 26 years I still kind of feel like my "belonging" is in limbo land.  I've been thinking about our Christmas that we will share with my extended family back in my home state.  Honestly, it doesn't feel like I belong there anymore.  And yet I don't feel like I belong here either.  


So.  The song.  Hopefully, you listened to it. (You'll have to turn off my music player at the bottom of my blog first.) And now for the lyrics.  This is the Music From My Heart after all.  


Have a great Christmas knowing that you are a treasure in the arms of Christ!


Forgiven


Well the past is playing with my head
And failure knocks me down again
I'm reminded of the wrong
That I have said and done
And that devil just won't let me forget.


In this life
I know what I've been
But here in Your arms
I know what I am
I'm forgiven
I'm forgiven
And I don't have to carry
The weight of who I've been
Cause I'm forgiven


My mistakes are running through my mind
And I'll relive my days, in the middle of the night
When I struggle with my pain, wrestle with my pride
Sometimes I feel alone, and I cry


In this life 
I know what I've been
But here in Your arms
I know what I am
I'm forgiven
I'm forgiven
And I don't have to carry 
The weight of who I've been
Cause I'm forgiven.


When I don't fit in and I don't feel like I belong anywhere
When I don't measure up to much in this life
Oh, I'm a treasure in the arms of Christ 'cause


I'm forgiven
I'm forgiven
And I don't have to carry
The weight of who I've been
Cause I'm forgiven.






Merry Christmas because we are forgiven!
                     Linda
                     

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Linda, that's so neat. And so great to see how the Lord is working in your life. Thanks for sharing it!

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