Saturday, June 13, 2015

Tears and Fears

There have been quite a few tears and fears this week in our family.  

Monday morning when I got in to check on Adam and start one of his antibiotics I saw that a couple hours before, Craig had charted a temperature of 100 for him.  So, I took his temperature again and it was 101 degrees which is to be reported to the home health nurse and doctors at KU.  I didn't really want to make that call but I knew that I needed to do it. When HH contacted us back they said that we needed to get Adam to the ER at KU as soon as we could which meant that we needed an ambulance.  I'm pretty sure that was the first time in my life that I have actually called 911 myself.  

In literally just a few minutes the Axtell ambulance was in our driveway and things shifted into high gear.  Since they cannot transport directly to KU unless it is life threatening, they took Adam to Sabetha and he was evaluated there.  Then he got into another ambulance and I got to ride with him to KU Med.  It was a bumpy, painful ride for him since the roads are pretty torn up with construction. But he had two friends from his work taking him on the ride so it was comforting, in a sense to be "carried along" by people who care about him.

When we first got settled back on Unit 64 he was not too happy that we were there because his temp at that moment in time was 98.6 degrees.  But he needed to be in the hospital and I think that was the only way for God to get us there.  

The doctors had hoped that he could get 2 weeks of respite away from the hospital without incident but we only made it 10 days.  So now he is back while he waits for the surgery that he needs to get him on the mend and hopefully back to a normal, healthy life.  

I came home Tuesday night because I had an appointment on Wednesday morning in Manhattan.  When I got ready to walk out the door Wednesday, Katrina came downstairs and asked me if  I was really leaving that early.  I said yes and then she had to confess that my family had cooked up a surprise for my birthday (the following day) in which my dear friend Vickie was taking me down and after my appointment would take me for a pedicure as a gift from my mom and my sister.  It was a great surprise and a wonderful time for me to relax and be able to talk out all my feelings with my sweet friend.  

After getting home that afternoon we got the house straightened up and clothes washed so I could pack to go back down to KC.  It was such a joy to spend my birthday with most of my family and to get phone calls of love from my 2 boys who were working far away.  

But it was a teary day for me.  For one thing, it is really hard to be so loved and cared about when you just want to love and care for everyone else.  My husband surprised me with a lovely gift and card filled with words that were stretching my attributes a lot.  My Katrina gave me a sweet card with words that caused me to cry.  My mom's card made me cry.  My sweet boy in the hospital had a vase of roses for me and a sweet, loving card.  The nurses on Unit 64 even brought me some flowers.  My birthday buddy, Jan had left me some flowers the night before.   Everyone was so sweet to me and it was quite overwhelming.  

And then they told us that we would be meeting with a couple of docs and the surgeon to talk about surgery so there were tears thinking about all of that and possibly feeling a bit sick to my stomach about it as well.  

The meeting of "the 3" never happened but one doctor did come by and mention that he feels that surgery is a necessity and should happen soon by his account.  He is not the one who gets to ultimately decide but he is Adam's doctor so he knows.  The elusive surgeon has never made it to talk to us but that's because he has been doing liver transplants right and left.  He did 3 on Friday and 1 this morning.  He's a little busy.

There were some other incidents that I will not go into detail about here but they were a little distressing at the time so fears and tears happened again.  

We would certainly appreciate your prayers for Adam as he waits for surgery.  He wants it to happen soon, of course, because he hopes it will get him on the path to recovery more quickly, as do we.  But we want it to be in God's timing and with God's direction.  Please also pray for Dr. K, the surgeon, who will be doing a very difficult and complicated surgery to put things back together and to make decisions in the moment that will affect Adam's future.  Please pray that Dr. K would be rested, that he would feel confident of what he needs to do and that he would be wise.  Also,please pray for his associates, Dr. S and Dr. J. 

I would ask you to pray for our whole family as this is a difficult time for all of us.  Anna will be away at camp this week and she came to me a bit ago saying that she is a little sad about leaving during this unsure time for us all.  We want her to be able to get away with her friends in youth group and have some fun after all of this stress this past many months. Pray for Craig as he has had many claims to work that have gotten delayed by the rain which has been nice, but he does still have all of that work to catch up on and it weighs on him.  Pray for my other boys Nathan and Zach, who are away from the rest of us, that they could concentrate on their work and be able to rest in the Everlasting Arms of our Savior as they wait for word on the surgery.  Pray for Katrina, who will be with us in KC that she will be held up also by those same Everlasting Arms as she is a very great comfort to Craig and I.  Pray for me, as I watch my precious son, whom I carried those many years ago and whom I placed into the hands of surgeons nearly 17 years ago, that I will feel that same Grace that steadied me then, now.

We are so grateful for the MANY friends and family who continue to daily lift us up before Jesus for healing and strength!!!

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