Monday, February 28, 2011

Moms Who Wrestle

When I was younger and living at home there were times that my mom would say to me, "I just couldn't sleep last night with so much in my mind."  I. Did. Not. Get. It.

Sleep is my dear friend.  Always has been.  Even as a very young child my mom tells me that I went to bed before it got dark and got up late in the morning, therefore, not needing an afternoon nap.

And though I hate to always be bringing it up: fibromyalgia=bad sleep.  Which in turn = pain and fatigue throughout the day.  I needed to show that "equation" to point out my intense love of and sad lacking of good, deep, sleep.

So, last night my hubby was gone overnight and usually that means I get to go to bed really early and have really good sleep (ie. no late night TV watching, snoring or hogging the whole bed by you know who).

But when you are a mom of "older" children and adult children there is something that happens to you when your greatest desire is to get really great sleep.  You think.  You think about all of the things each of your "children" are dealing with and ergo how you should deal with it or not and it makes for a very restless night.  It is kind of like an all night wrestling match.  

I try to turn those kind of nights into praying for my kids but often I fail to pray the prayer and let it go.  It turns into another kind of wrestling match with God over what I should "do" about what I'm praying about.  

Last night was one of those nights.  

Tell me, are you on the wrestling team with me?


  1. Im with you linda, My husband doesn't understand why you cant just shut off your mind and deal with it in the morning. I have 5 different boys and they all have there own problems.
    one can't find a interinship for summer and i can't understand why he has applied for probably 60 jobs. He's one of the top 3 students in Accounting and finance. All the kids he has tutored though college have interins and he can't get one. I tell him its because of his job. He works a bramlage and it a great job because he can work around his heavy study schedule. He works when he can. I have prayed my heart out and I keep telling him the right one just hasn't come around yet and he wants to just give up.
    Another one is in Special Ed in School because he has reading difficulties, but actually is very smart just can't get the reading, but if he is read to gets really good grades. So why can he not read? Therefore, he is picked to alot and has alot of emotional problems. Very serious emotional problems teachers and coaches are just as much of a problem and the other kids.
    One thinks he has life all figured out boy is he in for a rude awaking. He is very organized and will do very good at what he does but I think hes going to learn a few things along the way. He starts college next year.
    Another can't be with out his girlfriend ever. The good news is this year he has decided that A's in school are a good thing. Not that he has ever had bad grades but he decided to do well in college he should learn some homework skills. Thenk God for that.
    My little one is such a worker that i tell him you are going to work the rest of your life you dont have to work so hard at 12 years old. He is with his dad 24/7. Loves the farm.
    Just to tell you a little bit of whats on my mind. So don't think you are the only one. I lay awake all night and drag my __s all day. Somebody told me that there doctor told them to take Mid Night and that does help some nights,. I really think that is what mothers are suppose to do worry about our kids.
    What weight are we wrestling? Lets please go back to before we had kids and are in a little better shape to weight in. Please and Thank you. Kim

  2. Kim
    thanks for commenting. It was easy wasn't it?!

    I have to say that I don't wrestle enough in prayer and that I don't have that many sleepless nights. But sometimes we moms take on all of our kids' issues and that makes us "weigh"more than we need to. Some days I wish I could go back and be a better teacher to my kids and a much better pray-er about the things that really matter.

  3. I totally wrestle. My mind is ready to unload at the end of the day and Anthony's already snoring. :S And my kids are little but I still go through so many thoughts...I have to have a pen and paper by the bed.